The Gods of Now On Tour – Day 3

Is this the anti-ambivalence tour? I can’t make up my mind. Zasta mentions Shit Hole hot chicks – I wonder what the hell keps ‘em there – but when you meet one you’ll know. We all need a collective Cognitive Analysis Therapist – it an issue of self-esteem, pure and simple. I don’t think most of these people would need two or three sessions to become aware of this. Fuck the fact that she’s had a bad child hood – we’ve all had bad childhoods – but really it’s so self indulgent to dwell on how we got here, it’s what do we do now that we’re here. Not to many of these Shit Hold hot chicks have the tools to deal with this that’s for sure.

We stop for food in Thunderian Bayer – Montana’s. Hot Girl seated us. She looked at the ground like it was her best friend. I understand this. I just don’t know why, when the alternative is to make new social connections (I bet every day of the week she says “I’ve got to get out of here”), someone would opt for increasing the solitude. We ate. It was good. My vegetarian burger did a great job of trying to moo.

I look at the troops. They’re spoiling to play. Tomorrow night is going to be good. I feel it. I feel the energy. I remember that this isn’t sight seeing. This isn’t a Rock Tour. This is The Gods Of Now destroying what was and more importantly, building it back the way we want it.

Once again we must feed the fiery hot furnace of the Banyion whose mighty engine has been burning us down to hell. So we get gas at a Husky station. The gas guy runs out “You guys are a band? I want something! Give me something! What have you got? You got a CD? I want to buy something” Ahhhhh! We all got wired off of this guy’s crazy energy! What a music fan! We sold him a shirt.

We all talked about the show – how to make it more TGON – more organic – natural. Talked about why we do this. We all have our own reasons – personal reasons that are valid and make this a very strong cast of characters. The dead ghosts of pasts, the monsters on the edge of the map cannot stop this. Some of us fight them both every day. Some are able to forget they exist. But it all makes TGON a very powerful force.

The scenery changes from rolling to flat. The weather changes from Hot to Cold. The sky changes for clear blue to ash grey. We don’t mind. The rain sometimes washes more than feeds.

Beside the road a very big dog! NO! A bear! A fat one. We all tell him that he rocks! “Yo!! Bear! YEAH! You rock! Go bear!” He looked at us and then ignored us. Cool.

In Winnipeg. It’s been a long time. I feel no attachment to this place any longer. Montreal is my home, my love and my life. This is Winnipeg.

I’m feeling adored by the world my baby. This isn’t situational at this point. This makes me feel that I’m on the right track. I just know that things are as they should be right now and I’m very comfortable in this.

Am I happy? I think so. Again, my ambivalence is showing. Kidding. I’m not even tired right now. But I’m very much in tune with focusing my energy which is at 110% right now. This is going to be a very, very good tour.

Went out after eating a Papa Georges. Wandering down Corydon Ave. Taking big fast Winnipeg walking steps. The middle of street isn’t enough room for The Gods Of Now. The Winnipeg Police ask politely if we can walk on the sidewalk. Good times. Got drunk and made drunk phone calls to those who we need to talk to in that state. Hanging to dry is not good when you have no anchor. Mine tells me I’ll be fine. I believe her.

Time to sleep.

Somewhat Related Entries

• The Gods of Now On Tour – Day 22
• The Gods Of Now On Tour – Day 15
• List Of Upcoming Shows – September Tour
• The Gods Of Now On Tour – Day 25
• The Gods of Now On Tour – Day 20