I’m Not IN The Business, I AM The Business

Life is balance. Half of the time I’m wondering what the hell is wrong with me and the other half I’m amazed at how much I love your fucking ass.

But right now – the rain has pulled all the dust from the air. It smells like the first kiss you ever had with the coolest person you’ve ever met.

And then it’s all down hill from there.

The hate of winter is near.

And speaking of hate I went to the Liberal Party of Canada fund raiser at the PUSH Art Gallery on St. Laurent. No I don’t hate the Liberal Party or any party (maybe the Yogic Flyers but that’s just cuz their too damn happy to be alive). I just hate people. And this isn’t good for social situations like this. It makes me stand by myself. A little cloud of self loathing for even being there swirling above my head.

Justin Trudeau was the guest of honor – he showed up in cell-phone form because he was on the Campaign trail in North Bay – understandable – but a little bit funny too. His lovely wife held him up for all to hear (Pregnant women are so goddamn hot don’t you think?). I was drinking down as much free wine as I could. I wondered if the people there ‘d ask me to stop. I kind of wanted them to. I would have said “It’s alright, I’m an artist. It’s my job.”

But there were Cultural Industrialists there that could have easily claimed the same thing. But really how can a 84 Billion dollar a year business have anything to do with art? Someone is making money somewhere – but it sure as fuck isn’t the artists.

And if you ever thought about voting – try this shit jacket on for size. This 84 billion dollar a year business of culture is supposedly going to be funded, in some fucked up Conservative Party theory, by 24 million dollars per year. Oh but it gets better – they’ll only give that 24 million (which is about the same amount as Stephen Harper spends on his summer cottage) to those few who are conforming to party standards and values of art. Let’s all sing together “Deutschland, Deutschland Uber Alas!”

We used to vote to get a party elected – now a vote is for anyone who can win AGAINST the party you just can’t stand.

But in this fucking mess were in it all makes sense somehow. Little subtle changes that let you know you’re not living in simple times. Huffing is classic. Microwaving your head for a buzz – now there’s a modernity.

Oh and if you’re Conservative and reading this – Sieg Heil to you too. Lemme press the Microwave Start button for ya.

Now what I’m wanting to say is this…

We’re putting on The Gods Of Now Record Launch here in Montreal on Wednesday, October 22. The venue is booked – Sala Rossa 4848 Boul St. Laurent. With no help at all from Government Funding Organizations. Nice.

Originally – when Zasta and I were talking about our CD launch someplace, somewhere on the road a few weeks ago I told him I wanted to get some kind of Tibetan or Slovanic Choir to perform as people filled in – getting their complementary glass of wine (Oui! Du bon gout!) and saying to themselves “Holy fucking shit – this is a heavy music CD launch – no fucking way!” and then realizing with a smack to their own foreheads, “Of course, it’s The Gods Of Now! I should have known they’d be doing something really fucking different”.

But after calling everyone I could – including the Tibetan Resto downtown (the cook gave me the name of his cousin who works at the Tibetan Culture office). I quickly realized that those monks who sing the deep resonating chants – the Slovanic Priests do this too – are actually IN Asia. Goddamn it – no government funding to bring them in – and I don’t think the Conservatives like Tibetans anyway – too whiny about human rights to be in line with party values. So we go to plan B.

Me and Zasta have a project – sort of like Music For Airports by Eno but more sticking-your-head-in-a-microwave-for-the-buzz modern. And hopefully a fire breather to perform at the same time. I’m not kidding.

Then there’s the Fetish Acrobats (we still have to find out if they want to be called this – there is a YouTube vid of the girl and it’s really incredible what she can do! And tasteful too.) Stop it! I’m not kidding about this either.

And the small art gallery section with the pix from the TGON poster which you can buy. They will be blown up to 3’X4’ and framed (including that controversial one where Jon is holding the gun to a girl’s head while she’s giving Alex a blowjob) Damn it! I just lost another 300 000 dollars of grant money! Stupid Conservative Family Values! I don’t wanna die poor!

Followed by TGON playing in all it’s glory. Great!

Only a few loose ends to tie up and it’ll be on autopilot. Believe me this is a night you don’t wanna miss.

I had the banyion fixed because we have a show tonight and on Sunday. She is all happy and purring like the beast she is. Oh but HA! Tonight’s show was all booked by Paul Husband. You remember Dickless, right? So it was CANCELLED!!

Wait: listen to this…

Prophecies of War is a multimedia show that has been performed to rave reviews in NYC, Chicago and Washington in the USA. Now the producers want to bring it to Canada. And who did they find to book this? You guessed it – Paul Husband and his group of stupid fucks.

We didn’t find this out until last week – so when we did AMP called Sam (he’s our booking guy who set this up WITH Paul Husband), Sam had been trying to reach Paul Husband about this show for days with no luck.

Whatever, more of the same excuses right? So AMP is angry. She was a reporter so she can track anyone down. Just give her a phone and 10 minutes. So she finds the producers and calls them immediately to find out if the show was actually on. With a sigh of relief the producer said he was so grateful that she called him – he’s been trying with no luck to reach Paul Husband because none of the bands know what’s going on – nor does the producer know what has been done up here in Canada to have the show become the same success it was in the US. We are the only professionals to have called.

Sigh…

BTW – our former booking guy, Sam, has a band. (I say former because, get this – he fired us!! HAHAHAHA! Do you believe it?? Because of me writing the truth of what happened on the road. I wasn’t even making the shit up – it was the fucking truth! But he couldn’t take it. Jokes on him tho. Because he fired us we’re off the hook contractually speaking from owing him ANYTHING. Such a poor business man – he could have simply apologized to the band and we would have parted friends and he would have gotten his money AND I would have said so here in writing. Oh well, we all make bad choices sometimes – I can attest to that personally in this case) . Anyway his band was supposed to play last night, Wednesday night…

The only reason he knew he was actually playing was because AMP was asked by the producers when she was talking to them, AFTER Sam fired us, to call Sam to tell him that they were expecting his band to show up.

AMP is a pro in all things so she called. But remember who’s show this is – Paul “Dickless” Husband – so it gets cancelled. WOW! So Sam gets a little taste of the magic that is Paul Husband – but seeing Sam’s itinerary for their cross Canada tour, he’s going to be eating shit right out of Karma’s hairy ass cuz he’s got Paul Husband booking him a lot by the looks of things. Let’s all have a moment of silence for the last days of Sam’s band. Oops, we’ve all forgotten them already, never mind.

So as it stands now we have a show on Sunday with this Prophecies of War. Hopefully it’ll work out. Blah, blah, blah. Paul Husband – not!

So here’s the last word on it.

Stay away from Paul Husband. Shit happens but not this much. This guy has no talent at all as a booker – and if you work with Sam’s company make fucking sure he’s not booking you through Paul. If you haven’t noticed – Paul sucks man ass as a booker.

End of this fucking chapter.

Now, what’s new with The Gods right?

Alex is happy,

Zasta is relaxing.

Jon is moving to the island of Montreal from the South Shore.

Wha?

Yeah – it’s all going to hell in a bad fucking way. We need to get back to reality here. Alex needs to be walking down the street giving strangers a dick punch. Zasta needs to be in 47 bands that he wants to quit and Jon should be safe on the south shore saying “don’t touch my stuff” while brandishing the knife I gave him for his birthday.

In other words we need some insanity to get us back on track.

Any ideas?

Somewhat Related Entries

• The Gods Of Now On Tour – Day 25
• The Gods Of Now On Tour – Day 1
• The Gods Of Now On Tour – Day 24
• Connections
• The Gods of Now On Tour – Day 9